Iantos 30th Birthday
by Dark Knight Harkness
Summary: Title says it all. Its Iantos 30th and Jack wants to make it special. But Ianto doesn't want to be 30. What will Jack do to make Ianto happy? Rated T for safety.
1. Chapter 1

**Ianto's 30****th**** Birthday**

A.N. Title really gives it away, huh?! It's Ianto's 30th and Jack is determined to make it one to remember. But, what if Jack didn't count on Ianto not wanting to be 30? In this Jack and Ianto are a couple, so yes this is a Janto fic. If you don't like slash, I suggest you back away slowly and click on the back button. Don't say I didn't warn you. Also this is my first Torchwood fic so please be nice. The characters will probably be OOC anyway. This is dedicated to my best mate Becky who doesn't know it yet but gave me the inspiration for this fic. Couldn't have done it without you babe.

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_"It's the Six AM News and I'm you're host..."_

BANG!

Ianto slammed his hand down on the alarm clock's snooze button and glared at it. Out of the corner of his eye, he could just see the date.

"Oh nooo..." he groaned. Jack stirred next to him. He lifted his heavy head and looked at Ianto. Now normally, Ianto would have giggled at him, but today, even Jack's bed hair couldn't lift him from his annoyance.

"Whats up, Yan?" Jack asked as he kissed Ianto's neck. Ianto pushed Jack off as he shoved his head into his pillow and groaned. "Yaaannnn?"

Ianto turned his head to the side and mumbled something before shoving his head back into his pillow.

"Didn't _quite_ catch that, Yan-yan." Jack grinned as he used his pet name for Ianto. He knew exactly what was wrong with him and was already planning on a better day for Ianto.

"I'm bloody 30," Ianto grumbled louder, even though he knew Jack knew what was wrong with him. He shoved his head back into his pillow. Then, in his annoyance, he started to punch the hell out of his pillow.

"Hey! Hey, hey, hey. It's OK. I passed 30 a hundred and nine years ago so don't worry about it." Jack took hold of Ianto's hands and turned him round to look at him. He gave him a soft kiss on the lips that made Ianto smile a little.

"Yeah, but now I'm 30, I'm not young and good-looking anymore." Ianto seemed to joke about this, but the look on his face told Jack 'Don't even think about it.'

"Hey. You're still good-looking to me." Jack smiled.

"You would still say that even if I had been repeatedly mauled by a Weevil, so you can't talk." Ianto grinned. His mood had lightened a little bit. He put his arms round Jack's neck and pulled him into a passionate kiss.

"I can talk. I open my mouth and it comes out." Jack said laughing. He was pleased that Ianto was in a better mood.

"Yeah, but then you never shut it again." Ianto laughed along with Jack. He had almost forgotten that he knew Jack was up to something, and knowing Jack like he did, he knew it was going to happen at the hub.

"And thats a bad thing?! Anyway, now you're happy again, you ready to get to the hub? I'm sure the guys will want to congratulate you on reaching this pivotal point in your life." Jack smiled, but almost as soon as he had shut his mouth, he recieved a punch to his arm. Ianto stormed out of the bedroom into the adjoining bathroom with a look of thunder on his face. Jack groaned inwardly as he nursed his aching arm. This was going to be one **hell **of a day.

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A.N. So what do you think? I decided that Jack should be a guy that has bed hair just cos it seemed funny, and I get bed hair. Anyway, moving on. This was gonna be a one shot but I decided it was gonna be in chapters. So, you know something, reviews make me happy. Becky.

Die and be free of pain or live and fight your sorrow!

DKH


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

A.N. Thanks to all the people who read the last chapter. Heres the new one!

Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood but I wish I did.

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"If you have done anything, like decorating the Hub, I will kill you. And make sure that you don't come back this time." 

Ianto and Jack were in Ianto's car and driving towards the Hub. Jack gulped as he heard Ianto's words. He hadn't exactly decorated the Hub, but asked Gwen, Owen and Tosh to do it for him.

"Uh...," Jack laughed uneasily.

"Oh, and whatever happened to my present?" Ianto gave Jack a look that said 'You had better have got me a present.' Jack gulped. He had got him something, he just wasn't too sure about it.

"I got you something, don't worry about it. I just don't know if you will like it." Jack let his eyes drift to Ianto before looking back at the road. Ianto reached across and put his hand on Jack's thigh and kissed his cheek.

"I'm sure I'll love it. Now give me my present!" Ianto reached for the thing in Jack's pocket but Jack slapped his hands away.

"MEH!!!"

"No. I'll give you it later. When I want to." Jack goaded. Ianto sat back again and folded his arms and pouted. Jack laughed.

"You look gorgeous like that but you know it does nothing to me!" Ianto still pouted at him and made a noise that sounded like a long high-pitched 'meh'. Jack started laughing loudly at him. Ianto frowned at him and started poking him in the side where he knew that Jack was ticklish.

"Ok Yan, stop now! _(poke)_ Yan!_ (poke) _**IANTO!**" Jack screamed. "I will pull this car over young man! Oh look, we're here!" Jack pulled the keys out of the ignition and practically jumped out of the car, just to get away from Ianto's incessant poking. But, just to be courteous, he legged it round to Ianto's side and held the door open for him. Ianto climbed out of the car, kissed Jack on the cheek and poked him in the side again. Jack then held his arm out as Ianto looped his round it as they walked towards the door of the fake tourist office.

"Remember, anything, any decorations and you will die a horrible painful death and I will make sure that you do not come back." Ianto reminded Jack as they walked through the office and the stone corridor to the Hub. As the cog door rolled open...

"SUPRISE!"

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A.N I think this is the quickest I have ever updated! Go me! Again thanks to all the people who reviewed! Janto plushies for all of you! I'll try and update soon!

Die and be free of pain or live and fight your sorrow!

DKH


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